‘Ask questions that are so big
only your life can answer them’

Rose Macario
CEO Patagonia

The art and practice of curiosity

In my coaching work I often ask leaders about a word that they want to define as their ‘watch word’. A word that will help shape them as leaders as they go about the business of leading.

At the start of this new year I’ve mulled over my word for 2024. I wanted one that would remind me to stay open to learning, to practice ‘beginner mind’, and to be fully attentive, without filters, to what’s going on moment by moment and day by day.

My word for 2024 is ‘curiosity’.

I also chose this to help deepen my mindfulness practice. Mindful leaders are curious - about themselves, those around them and the world they live and lead in. They ask open questions, without judgment and with the intention to learn. They know they are always in the process of ‘becoming’.

How might we practice this type of curiosity? I’d like to introduce you to the practice of ‘becoming your own leadership guides’. I explore this in the final session of my ‘Leading with Presence’ programme, and Astrid Korin and I have now introduced it into our Inside Out Programme.

Here’s an extract from ‘Leading with Presence’ that introduces it to you:

Becoming your own leadership guide 

Many years ago, at NCSL, we had a weekend residential programme for DCSs (Directors of Children's Services). We invited the poet David Whyte along to work with them. This was a touch and go moment. As they clutched their blackberries (it WAS a while ago!), they wondered what a poet could teach them about leading complex systems, balancing budgets and dealing with multiple crises. Some were ready to leave by lunchtime. 

David introduced them to his idea of ‘questions that have no right to go away’ saying:

 'Questions that have no right to go away are those that have to do with the person we are about to become. They almost always have something to do with how we might be more generous, more courageous, more present, and more dedicated.’

He then added; ‘the marvellous thing about a good question is that it shapes our identity as much by the asking as it does by the answering.’

Which questions therefore, if you persistently asked them of yourself would make the biggest difference to you, and your leadership?

What will be your questions to lead by in 2024? These are not ‘to do’ questions, but ‘to be ‘questions. They are your ‘personal compass’ that will serve you as you grow as a mindful leader, year on year.

Here are mine, written all those years ago in the session with the DCSs and still act as guides for my leadership journey. You will create your own. Why not take some time to do this, share them with your team and invite them to create their own questions to lead by?

1.Who am I over listening to and who am I under listening to; what conversation do I need to have and with whom, that I am currently avoiding?

 2. What is my deepest intention in my work and to what extent is this modelled through where I’m placing my attention?  

3. How many answers did I give today as opposed to questions asked – and to what extent were the questions I asked genuine ones to which I did not yet know the answer?

4. To what extent did I lead true to my core values, how well did I embody them today?

5. To what extent am I living by my mantra to ‘address issues with toughness and treat people kindly’?

6. To what extent am I leading wholeheartedly and fully present – tuned into gratitude and joy in my day to day work?

By the way the DCSs I mentioned earlier all stayed - and found the weekend one of the most profound and transformative of their careers.

If you are intrigued and want to know more about this practice then take a look at David Whytes work on ‘questions that have no right to go away’.