I said I'm strong, straight
Willing to be a shelter
In a storm

Joan Armatrading

Stormy weather

On Hawaii there is a sacred site called ‘Puʻuhonua o Hōnaunau’. It’s a place where historically, whatever you were fleeing from; war, persecution, or the law, no harm could come to you. In other words it was a place of sanctuary, of true refuge, of calm’.

At the start of this week of national strike action Geoff Barton tweeted ‘what is expected of leaders in times of crisis is not stamina; it is judgement and that can only come from a place of inner strength and calm’.

I spent a day with a Multi Academy Trust this week and one of the members of the central team reminded us that giving ourselves regular ‘recovery time’ when we need it is an important, and very necessary, leadership practice.

As we move into the last few weeks of this term how might we cultivate our own inner place of recovery and refuge, our shelter in a storm (or even just a squall). This is not a place to hide from the issues we face on a daily basis. It’s a place where we can pause, collect ourselves, and draw on our inner wisdom, values and principles to respond more wisely and authentically.

How Mindfulness can help.

Mindfulness helps us to tap into our inner strength, and to reconnect with our core principles and values on a daily basis.

Tough days can unsettle us. We can feel unbalanced as if we are losing our grip. Self-doubt can creep in.  Mindfulness helps us notice when we are leaning into a future replete with doubt and worry, or looking back on the day and giving ourselves a hard time. We can draw on some simple practices, helping us to come back to the present moment.

The present moment is a refuge, if we are able to pause and claim it as such. By going inward, if only for a few minutes we can find a steadfastness, and an inner confidence, even whilst in the midst of handling these complex issues for which there is never one simple answer.

Why not take up full residency in the present moment and become acquainted with your own place of refuge so you know you can return to it whenever the storms threaten.

Here’s how…

Claim your place – here by right.

We claim our right to be here by attending to our posture. Feel your feet on the ground and your backside on the chair if you are sitting and take 4/5 nice long deep breaths. Bring your attention to your body. Notice any tension in your body and as best you can, soften it and let it go.

Let your breath become your anchor. The breath is something we can quite literally count on when things seem to be falling apart. When we focus our attention on the breath and the body we can only ever be in the present moment. Notice the body and mind begin to settle.

Take refuge in this sense of being fully in the here and now.

Lean into the storm of emotions

Stuff happens, and when it does our emotions can overwhelm us and that place of refuge feels elusive. Fighting the emotion and trying to push it away ‘I shouldn't be getting so worked up about this’ simply intensifies it. Instead why not practice leaning into it with curiosity and kindness.

How do you know ‘anger is here’? You might notice that you feel hot, your heart beating more strongly, your hands might clench. Open your awareness to these bodily manifestations of anger, become curious about them, notice the sensations as they change, shift and watch them as they start to fade.

Notice the space that opens up beyond the storm of emotions. Sit in this refuge for a moment and as the sky begins to clear, move on to the next moment of your day. 

Shift ‘what if’ to ‘what is’

It might be one email or a phone call that sends our wild minds into a spiral. creating doomsday scenarios, and before we know it we are living the whole mental drama. It affects our mood, and our emotions and may cause us to be irritated with the next person who ‘wants just a minute’ of our time.

When we catch ourselves in the ‘what if’ looping thoughts, pause and very intentionally come back to ‘what is’. Simply sit or stand in stillness and ask yourself ‘exactly what am I feeling’, ‘what am I noticing in this very moment’, and ‘what else might be true right now?’. Open up your senses to the immediacy of this moment. 

Come back to the concrete, the solid, the immediate, the refuge – then carry on.

Go further

This is a short 3 minute talk from Rick Hanson, a mindfulness teacher and psychologist who has done a lot of work on ‘being refuge’ for self and others. In this talk he explores our collective need as humans for refuge and how to find it.